Have you ever watched online videos of people “playing” with cats and noticed the cat doesn’t actually look like it’s having fun? If so, you’re likely better than the average person at reading cat body language.
Regular interactive play supports cats’ physical health, reduces stress, and strengthens the human-cat bond.
But according to our most recent study, what many people think of as “play” may not be play at all. In fact, these interactions cause cats annoyance or stress.
When ‘play’ isn’t actually play
When playing, both humans and cats need to tell apart behaviors that might be threatening in other contexts, such as sudden movements, swatting, or chasing.
Research shows people struggle to interpret cat communication and often fail to notice when a cat doesn’t want to play. Even when they do notice, many people choose to continue anyway.
To understand why people might misinterpret or ignore cat stress signals, in our new study we analyzed 1,100 comments on social media videos hosted on YouTube, TikTok, Instagram, and Facebook depicting harmful “play.”
To avoid viral videos disproportionately influencing analysis, only the first 100 comments from each video were analyzed. Comments came from a mix of cat owners and non-cat owners.
All 11 videos included clear signs of cat distress such as hissing, biting, attempting escape, visible human injuries, and, in some cases, cats being physically harmed. Despite this, 75-93% of comments on all videos were positive. How come?
Why do people misinterpret cats?
Viewer misinterpretations appeared to be shaped by people’s existing beliefs about cats, human-cat dynamics, and what is fun or funny. Many comments normalized rough handling, reframed signs of stress as excitement or affection, or trivialized them as “cute” or “funny.”
In many cases, comments reflected cognitive dissonance (the mental discomfort when our established beliefs clash with conflicting evidence) and common coping mechanisms our brains use to reduce it, such as denial, dismissal, or becoming defensive:
anyone with a crumb of common sense can tell that this video isn’t animal abuse.
Comments also echoed problematic perceptions stemming from broader societal narratives:
if she didn’t want to, she’d run away
if they were really mad your arm would be dripping blood.
Such statements bear a striking resemblance to human sentiments such as “if it was so bad, why didn’t she leave?” directed at victims of intimate partner violence.
Common misinterpretations
1. ‘Real distress is unmistakable’
Viewers often believed that if a cat “truly” disliked an interaction, they’d leave or cause more serious injury. If there was no visible blood, the cat stayed, or didn’t match the person’s idea of “distressed”, viewers concluded they were playing.
In reality, cats often remain in an interaction or hold back attacks to reduce risks to themselves, as a “freeze” response, or to avoid escalation.
2. ‘It’s not stress, it’s excitement’
Viewers frequently misinterpreted distress signals (ears pinned back, tail thrashing, forceful attacks, growling) as signs a cat was enjoying rough “play.” They’d reference similar behaviors from their own cat as proof of cat enjoyment.
In reality, rough play is overstimulating. While cats may seem engaged, they’re likely being defensive, not playful.
3. ‘Cats know it’s just play’
Many viewers assumed that bonded or socialized cats could tell the difference between “playing” and “violence.” Others believed cats “knew” to hold back. This belief persisted even when a video depicted a baby being injured, with viewers insisting the cat was being gentle.
In reality, while cats may inhibit their actions during true play sessions, they can become overstimulated quickly, leading to distress and defensive injuries.
And they can still become stressed even when they know you’re playing. While cats may tolerate more from a person they trust, unwanted interactions are likely to damage trust over time.
4. ‘It’s how you gain trust’
Worryingly, viewers encouraged others to continue harmful interactions even as the cat became visibly distressed and aggressive, claiming this was the best way to “win over” a cat or gain their trust.
But cats communicate their distress for a reason: they want you to stop.
5. ‘It’s how cats show love’
Biting was often reframed by viewers as a sign of affection (a “love bite”), while human tolerance of injuries was often praised as a sign of devotion. Some viewers treated scratches as a badge of honor and insisted they’re a normal part of living with cats.
In reality, so-called love bites are usually a cat’s polite way of telling you they’ve had enough. If you’re constantly covered in bites or scratches, you’re likely regularly overstimulating your cat.
How to play with your cat safely
Let them choose. Always ensure your cat wants to play. Start slowly, allow your cat choice, provide multiple exit routes, and pay attention to subtle cues that they’ve had enough.
Avoid play-fighting. Rough play can quickly overwhelm a cat, teach them to treat hands as toys, and often leads to injury. Instead, rotate different wand toys and similar items that keep you at arm’s length, protect from injury, and reduce the chance of accidentally causing stress.
Stay curious. In our study, many viewers misinterpreted cat behavior or dismissed clear stress signals not out of malice, but because acknowledging them conflicted with their established beliefs or self-image. If the idea that your play style might cause your cat stress makes you uncomfortable, take a leaf out of the book of cats and try to stay curious. Curiosity has been shown to be effective in helping people see past their own biases.
If we stay curious, we stay open to noticing when our cats are enjoying play, and when they want to stop.
Julia Henning, Researcher, School of Animal and Veterinary Science, Adelaide University
This article is republished from The Conversation under a Creative Commons license. Read the original article.
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