The journey of life brings you more understanding as you experience more. In fact, for many of the things you used to find hard to let go of, you can slowly learn to release them. Getting angry and complaining are two such things that need to be relinquished. Things that you used to be so attached to become easier to give up. With regard to many of the things you pursue, after a few moments of excitement, you find they do not bring you lasting happiness. This is the true nature of life.
You can put your energy into chasing your dreams, but remember not to be too fixated on the final outcome. When it comes to how you choose to use your time and energy, the following two things can be said to be the most useless things in the world.
Getting angry
When angry, you feel the most helpless and troubled, and even feel that life has no point.
It doesn’t help anything if you are angry at yourself. Your own mistakes and shortcomings will not suddenly disappear unless you take some action to make a change. It helps nothing if you are angry at others. Their mistakes will not disappear either, and they may not even know you are angry at them.
It would be a waste of time and energy to punish yourself and others for someone else’s mistakes. So getting angry is useless. You must always keep calm and face the people and things that make you angry, learn to reconcile with them, and then make some changes! This is the most effective approach. Everything else is futile, a complete waste of time and energy.
Complaining
A person who is used to complaining about life has no happiness to speak of. No matter what life gives them, they always look at those things that are not as good as they could be and are thus hurt by them over and over again. The more a person complains, the more they tend to see that life is not the way they want it to be.
If you think your lot in life is not good or that you constantly have bad luck, just reflect on whether or not you are often angry and complaining. In nature, you observe plants growing toward the sunshine. In fact, this is a good reminder for you. No matter what happens, you need to always maintain a positive and optimistic attitude. Then all the gloom will automatically dissipate, and the future will be better and better.
Signs of a truly mature person
A truly mature person will find they have fewer and fewer people to blame, because when you put yourself in another person’s shoes, you will realize that everyone has difficulties of their own.
During the Eastern Han Dynasty (A.D. 25-200), there was a man named Liu Kuan, who was known for his good temper. One day, his wife asked a maid to deliberately spill a bowl of beef broth on his court robe to see if he would get angry. When he saw what happened, the first thing he said was: “Did the broth burn your hands?”
Kindness is not just about giving to charity. It also involves having concern and compassion that extends to other people. Sometimes, suppressing your temper and emotions can reduce the mental burden and stress of others.
During the Warring States period (476-221 B.C.), Meng Changjun, a minister of the state of Qi, was so powerful and wealthy that there were many opportunists among his retainers. Later, when Meng was framed and removed from his post as minister, almost all of his retainers left him. The only exception was Feng Xuan, who was very loyal to him. Feng not only did not leave him, but also tried to help him regain his former position.
After Meng was successfully restored to his post, those who had left came and expressed their desire to join him again. Meng was furious: “These people are such bootlickers. If they really want to come, I will take the opportunity to humiliate them.” Feng Xuan told him that those who serve as retainers also have to find a way to survive and keep living no matter what happens to the lord they follow and that what they did was just human nature.
After listening to Feng’s advice, Meng Changjun not only didn’t make things difficult for them, but he also graciously accepted them back into his service.
Translated by Patty Zhang
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