Tolerance, patience, generosity, and kindness are easily spoken of, but they are challenging to embody, especially in today’s fast-paced world. In interpersonal dealings, the ability to show tolerance is not just admirable, but is also instrumental in resolving conflicts. Stories from ancient China, steeped in traditional culture, offer insightful examples of how these virtues were practiced in family and community settings.
Zhang Qixian’s lesson in forgiveness
Zhang Qixian, a renowned statesman of ancient China’s Northern Song Dynasty, faced a unique challenge during his tenure as the Officer of Transportation in Jiangnan. At a family gathering, he observed a servant quietly stealing silverware. Standing discreetly behind a curtain, Zhang witnessed this act, but chose to remain silent, a decision that would have significant implications years later.
Later, when Zhang Qixian became the prime minister, many of his servants also became officials. However, this servant did not receive an appointment to any position. The servant, perplexed and saddened by his stagnant position, approached Zhang, kneeling and inquiring: “I have served you faithfully for longer than others, and yet they have risen in ranks. Why have you forgotten me?” He wept incessantly, feeling a mix of confusion and hurt.
With a tone of understanding and regret, Zhang said: “I planned to keep this to myself, but now, if I don’t reveal it, you may resent me. Do you remember our time in Jiangnan and the silverware you thought no one saw you take? I have carried that secret for nearly three decades, not telling a soul, and it has burdened my heart.” He paused, letting the gravity of his words sink in. “As prime minister, my duty is to promote integrity. How could I elevate a man who once stole, even if he has since been loyal?”
Yet, in a gesture of tolerance and kindness, Zhang offered the servant a substantial sum of money as severance pay to start anew, recognizing the complexity of human character and the potential for redemption.
Yu Lingyi: Transforming a thief into an honorable man
In Caozhou, there lived a man named Yu Lingyi. He was honest and considerate and did not harm others to benefit himself. In his old age, his family was quite rich. One night, Yu Lingyi’s sons caught a thief attempting to steal from his home. The thief turned out to be the son of one of their neighbors. Yu Lingyi said to him: “You have never done anything bad in your life. Why resort to thievery?”
The thief, ashamed, spoke of his desperation and need for a certain sum of money to cover his basic needs for food and clothing. Yu, moved by the young man’s plight, provided the sum requested. As he started to leave, Yu Lingyi called him back. The thief was frightened, thinking Yu Lingyi had changed his mind and intended to report him to the authorities.
However, Yu Lingyi, with a tone of genuine concern, said to him: “Carrying such a large sum of money might draw unwanted attention, especially from the night patrollers who may question how a poor man such as yourself came to have it in your possession.” Yu Lingyi offered him shelter until morning and then sent him on his way. This act of unexpected kindness deeply moved the thief, who was filled with remorse and eventually transformed into a respectable citizen. In time, Yu Lingyi’s act of compassion became well-known in the neighborhood, earning him the reputation of a truly charitable man.
Yu Lingyi went on to build a school and arranged for famous scholars to come to teach the students. Eventually, one of Yu Lingyi’s sons, along with his nephew, ranked top in the examination for officials, and his family became a prominent family in the southern part of Caozhou. This was the blessing of his good deeds.
A timeless message from ancient China for the modern world
The words and deeds of these men from ancient China might be simple and sincere, but their tolerance, understanding, open-mindedness, and kindness are a testament to their character. In a world increasingly driven by material gain and quick judgments, these stories remind us of the enduring value of patience and kindness. The lessons from Zhang Qixian and Yu Lingyi are historical anecdotes and relevant guides for cultivating a more harmonious and tolerant society today.
Translated by Audrey Wang
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