How much does it really cost to raise a child from elementary school through university? And how does a family manage when money is always scarce?
For 16 years, Grandma Zhou kept careful records of every expense she incurred while raising her granddaughter, Xiaoling. Tuition fees, notebooks, pencils — nothing was too large or too small to be written down. But there was one category she recorded with special care: every donation they received from others.
She did it for one reason only, to teach her granddaughter gratitude — that kindness must never be forgotten.
Sixteen years, 110,000 yuan
Grandma Zhou lives in an aging dormitory building at the Songzao Coal Mine in Chongqing. In her small apartment, she keeps two worn ledgers. One documents Xiaoling’s elementary and middle school expenses; the other records the cost of her university education. On the university ledger, a bold heading stands out: “Donations for education.”
“There were many kind people who helped Xiaoling after she entered university in 2005,” Grandma Zhou said, holding the books in her hands. “I wrote down every single one.”
Before retirement, she worked as a pharmacist at the coal mine hospital. Her husband passed away early. When she retired in 1993, her monthly pension was just 290 yuan — an income that required a strictly frugal life. Even today, her pension stands at only 1,580 yuan a month, leaving little room for savings.
At the time, these amounts represented a heavy burden. In the 1990s and early 2000s, a monthly pension of a few hundred yuan barely covered basic necessities. By the time Xiaoling reached university, annual tuition of more than 10,000 yuan — roughly equivalent to over a year of Grandma Zhou’s early retirement income — was far beyond what most families in the mining community could comfortably afford.
Xiaoling’s father suffered from mental illness even before her birth and survived on welfare assistance. Until Xiaoling entered elementary school, Grandma Zhou cared for her alone. When Xiaoling reached middle school, her parents divorced, and Grandma Zhou began supporting her son as well.
After Xiaoling graduated from university, Grandma Zhou added up all the figures in her ledgers. From first grade through college, her granddaughter’s education had cost more than 120,000 yuan. After subtracting donations and contributions from Xiaoling’s mother, Grandma Zhou herself had paid 110,000 yuan — an amount that far exceeded her modest retirement income and accounted for more than 80 percent of her pension earnings over 16 years.
Repaying kindness, one gesture at a time
Last May, Xiaoling graduated from university and found a job at a bank promoting credit cards. Grandma Zhou, however, never forgot the names written in her ledgers.
Xiaoling’s annual university tuition exceeded 10,000 yuan. The year she was admitted, mine officials contributed some funds, while coworkers and neighbors donated more than 4,000 yuan altogether. Most of them were poor themselves — some gave 100 yuan, others only 50. These were small sums by any standard, but for working families at the mine, each contribution represented real sacrifice.
“To me, it didn’t matter how much they gave,” Grandma Zhou said. “Every contribution was a kindness that must be repaid over a lifetime.”
She decided to repay private donations first and find a way to return the company’s support later. One neighbor, Peng Qimao, had donated 150 yuan. When Peng’s grandson was born years later, Grandma Zhou hand-sewed two small baby outfits and gave them to the family.
“She raised a goose and saved up eggs for two months,” Peng recalled. “She brought me twenty goose eggs again recently. I told her I didn’t need them. But that’s just the kind of person she is.”
When another donor, Zuo Xuemin, lost his father in 2007, Grandma Zhou returned 100 yuan as condolence money. A doctor who lived on the fourth floor enjoyed growing flowers, but was often away. Because he had donated to Xiaoling’s education, Grandma Zhou climbed the stairs every day to water his plants in his absence.
Teaching gratitude by example
This past Spring Festival, Xiaoling finally returned home after starting work, staying only two days before leaving again. She brought back more than a dozen small flashlights—the kind banks give away as promotional gifts.
After Xiaoling left, Grandma Zhou went door to door, visiting everyone who had helped them over the years. In Xiaoling’s name, she gave each household a flashlight.
“Your Xiaoling is such a thoughtful girl,” neighbors told her.
Their praise made Grandma Zhou happier than any special meal could have.
As she reminisced, her smile softened. “Xiaoling was always a good child,” she said. “She collected discarded items to reuse and carried a small sack to the mine to gather coal slag. She’d crush it, mix it with mud, shape it into balls, and dry them to use as fuel.”
A tear slipped from the corner of her eye. “I don’t expect anything in return from her,” she said. “But she must never forget the kindness others have shown her.”
In gratitude for her grandmother’s sacrifices, Xiaoling has promised that once she buys a home, she will bring her grandmother to live with her.
Translated by Audrey Wang
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