Throughout your lifetime, you have undoubtedly had some regrets. Perhaps some regrets were significant, while some were small, and you wish you had more guidance to do better next time. The good news is history has left us ancient wisdom to help guide us.
One such example of wisdom comes from Kou Zhun, a famous politician in the Northern Song Dynasty. Kou Zhun wrote a legendary article that briefly explains six significant regrets that you may later have in life and sums up his advice in just six sentences.
The late Qing Dynasty statesman Zeng Guofan highly praised Kou Zhun’s article, regarding it as a classic that he regularly used for self-reflection and improvement.
The six significant regrets by Kou Zhun are called “Six Regrets Inscription” and are worth examining in detail to understand them, take them to heart, and apply them to our daily lives.
The six regrets
1. Using one’s office for personal gain and missing the right time to act
Officials who engage in corrupt practices and abuse their power for personal gain often regret their actions only when it’s too late. Many people enter politics intending to help others, but some succumb to temptation and engage in corrupt practices, which is truly lamentable.
Officials should be impartial and not prioritize personal interests over the country’s and people’s well-being. They should maintain a calm and unbiased attitude and not be easily swayed by emotions or external factors. Officials should not act out of personal interest or bias, as this can easily lead to corruption, cover-ups, wrongful imprisonment of others, and disregard for the law.
In such a position, it is the sworn responsibility of officials to work for the good of the country and people rather than trying to advance themselves. While public officials may think they have fooled others and gotten away with things to help themselves, those who do not heed this advice may face dire future situations.
2. Not being frugal when wealthy and not spending money wisely when poor
As the saying goes: “Wealth does not last for three generations.” This is because many people who are wealthy and privileged do not practice thrift and sound financial management, spending extravagantly and squandering their wealth. They may only regret their actions when they fall on hard times and lose everything. Friends who enjoy the same lifestyle may disappear when one falls into poverty.
Therefore, you should always prepare for the worst and practice thrift, even during times of prosperity. While hard work and frugality can lead to success and prosperity, extravagance can lead to ruin.
3. Wasting time and not learning enough skills before it’s too late
Not knowing a skill when young commonly leads to regret later in life. Many people waste their youth and have nothing to show for it in middle age, only to realize too late that they should have used their time more wisely. If they had taken the time to learn a skill when they were young, they might not have ended up in a difficult situation.
People learning a skill when young save time and effort in the long run and this proves to be very beneficial in life. However, if you are lazy and idle when you should be learning, you will typically regret it later in life. As the saying goes: “Youth is wasted on the young.” It’s essential to make the most of your youth and learn valuable skills.
4. Not paying attention to important matters when they arise
“Experience is the best teacher” is a saying for a reason, and you can learn from every experience you encounter in life. Society is a lifelong university where you can continue to learn and grow as long as you examine yourself when facing difficulties. Learning how to interact with others and navigate the complexities of life is an ongoing process that lasts a lifetime.
Being attentive to your surroundings and continually learning from your experiences can help you become more mature and wise. Every occasion, good or bad, is an opportunity for growth and learning. Therefore, you should always keep an open mind and be willing to learn from others. Such an approach to life will lead to both personal and professional development.
5. Speaking recklessly
Failing to manage your anger can lead to problems like saying things you regret, yelling at your children, threatening your co-workers, sending rash emails, developing health problems, or even resorting to physical violence. But not all anger issues are that serious. Instead, your anger might involve thinking about upsetting events, getting frustrated in traffic, or venting about work.
If you’ve gotten into the habit of losing your temper and speaking recklessly, take stock of the things that trigger your anger. Long lines, traffic jams, snarky comments, or excessive drinking are just a few things that might shorten your fuse and cause you to lash out. While you shouldn’t blame people or external circumstances for your inability to keep cool, understanding what triggers your anger can help you plan accordingly.
6. Neglecting your health
As someone once said: “Take care of your physical body. It’s the only place you have to live.”
During illness, people often regret not taking better care of their health. However, once they recover, they tend to forget the importance of maintaining a healthy lifestyle again. In modern times, where many people work long hours and often neglect their health, physical exhaustion and burnout have become commonplace.
Today, many prioritize money over their health, but no money can buy back good health. Good health is more important than wealth, fame, or fortune.
In conclusion
It’s challenging to live a life without regrets. Many people regret not getting into their desired school or not pursuing their dreams. However, have you ever asked yourself what truly matters most amid shame and regret? Is it truly not getting into a good school or making much money? Is it about being well-known or famous in society?
Reflecting on what is truly important and acting accordingly to avoid regrets later is essential.
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