The following story of unseen genuine compassion unfolded in Hong Kong.
In 1974, Hong Kong star Ng Man-tat joined the third artist training class at TVB, a major television broadcasting company in Hong Kong, where he became classmates with Chow Yun-fat. They often drank together and honed their acting skills. When Ng Man-tat shot to fame across China for his role as Hu Tiehua in The Legend of Chu Liuxiang, Chow Yun-fat was still an unknown actor. Later, in his twenties, Ng Man-tat became a celebrated supporting actor, quickly rising to fame.
However, once tempted by fame and fortune, it’s like asking the devil for directions — one ends up at the gates of hell. Ng Man-tat began to indulge in alcohol, women, and gambling, slacking off at work and ultimately destroying his budding career. The TV station shelved him for four years and he incurred a gambling debt of HK$300,000. Meanwhile, his close friend Chow Yun-fat soared to stardom with his role as Hui Man-keung in The Bund.
A compassionate cold shoulder
Chow Yun-fat was known for his generosity, and lending HK$300,000 wouldn’t have been difficult for him. So Ng Man-tat approached him for a loan, but Chow Yun-fat gave him nothing and instead told him: “Solve it yourself!” This left Ng Man-tat heartbroken. How could his friend refuse to help him in his darkest hour? He swore never to speak to Chow Yun-fat again.
Hitting rock bottom
Ng Man-tat later recalled: “I considered suicide, but didn’t have the courage. My only option was to accept bankruptcy.” Just when he hit rock bottom, he unexpectedly received a movie offer. Seizing the opportunity, he worked hard on his acting skills. The film was well-received, and in 1990, Ng Man-tat starred in A Moment of Romance, which pulled him out of his slump, allowed him to pay off his debts, and he won the 1991 Hong Kong Film Award for Best Supporting Actor.
The truth revealed
Chow Yun-fat was in the audience at the awards ceremony. Ng Man-tat glanced at him, but ignored him, focusing instead on thanking the director. The director then said: “The person you should thank the most isn’t me…” It turned out that Chow Yun-fat had strongly recommended Ng Man-tat to the director back then! Ng Man-tat was overwhelmed with emotion. He realized that he had misunderstood his friend’s kind intentions and genuine compassion. Had Chow Yun-fat lent him the HK$300,000, he would have squandered it on gambling and drinking, sinking deeper into despair with no way out. Knowing the truth, Ng Man-tat finally resolved his inner turmoil and publicly thanked Chow Yun-fat for the “favor of not lending money.”
“Sympathy in dire straits does not bring salvation; only resilience and determination earn respect.” This was the message his best friend wanted to convey! There is a form of kindness that quietly tidies up the mess without seeking recognition. Genuine compassion isn’t about hastily fulfilling one’s own desires or catering to others’ whims. Love and kindness are about empowering others and maintaining their dignity. In the adult world, the most respectful way to show compassion is not through condescending sympathy or charity, but by discreetly helping others solve their problems and improve while preserving the other person’s dignity. All the quiet acts of compassion in this world deserve our respect and emulation.
Translated by Katy Liu
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