In 2002, actress Sun Li began sponsoring a boy named Xiang Haiqing from a remote mountain village. But the kind deed would later turn unexpectedly sour. Xiang Haiqing not only turned against his benefactor, but he even threatened to “ruin” her. What exactly happened between them? Why did a bond of kindness turn into resentment? And now, over two decades later, what kind of life is Xiang Haiqing living?
In 2002, when Sun Li was filming Jade Goddess of Mercy, she was a rookie actress, earning very modest wages. At the time, she saw a TV documentary featuring a high school boy named Xiang Haiqing from the mountains of Chongqing. He was shown walking to school in worn, patched-up clothes. Sun contacted the program team without hesitation and offered to sponsor the boy.
Sun Li came from a humble background. Raised by a single mother, she once lived in a basement and couldn’t afford bus fare. Perhaps it was precisely this experience that stirred her compassion. She sent Xiang Haiqing 500 yuan a month from her limited income to cover his living expenses — a sum that could feed a child in the mountains for three months, when the average salary in Beijing was just around 2,000 yuan.
In addition to money, she consistently wrote handwritten letters to him. Like an older sister who genuinely cared, she offered him study tips and advice on how to get along with his city classmates. In 2005, after repeating two years, Xiang Haiqing was finally admitted to Shanghai Ocean University. Sun Li personally took him to register for college. At the train station, the mountain boy discovered for the first time that his “Sister Sun” was a well-known actress.
Xiang Haiqing became ungrateful
From that moment on, things began to change. Xiang Haiqing noticed that his roommates were using the latest Nokia phones, but he only had a second-hand pager-like phone. His classmates wore Nike and Adidas, while he still wore the canvas shoes Sun Li had sent him. He began calling Sun Li’s assistant frequently, not always for necessities. Sometimes it was for “reference books,” other times for “extra classes.” His requests for money increased from once a month to five or six times a month.
The most excessive was when he asked for 800 yuan and used it to buy a pair of limited-edition sneakers, which he proudly showed off in the dorm. Sun Li’s team sensed something was wrong and sent someone to the university to investigate. They discovered that Xiang Haiqing was no longer the struggling poor student from the documentary. He received a 6,000-yuan annual government scholarship and earned extra income as a private tutor; however, he spent most of his money on socializing and maintaining appearances.
Sun Li made the difficult decision to stop supporting him. What followed was completely unexpected. Xiang Haiqing wrote a 6,000-word open letter and posted it on a public forum. Between the lines, he insinuated that the celebrity was heartless and painted himself as an abandoned, impoverished student. The post went viral in 2006. Sun Li was heavily criticized online, and at the height of the backlash, she received hundreds of hate mail daily. She even lost endorsement deals. Both she and her mother suffered from insomnia.
A journalist went undercover at Shanghai Ocean University and uncovered Xiang Haiqing’s spending habits: over 300 yuan per month on phone bills, frequent restaurant meals, and even taking his girlfriend to Hangzhou for a vacation. Classmates revealed that Xiang Haiqing often bragged: “My sister is Sun Li,” and used her fame to gain clout in the student union. Under mounting public pressure, Xiang Haiqing became the target of widespread criticism. Reporters kept coming to the campus for interviews, and overwhelmed, he eventually took a year off from school.
After graduating in 2009, Xiang Haiqing struggled to find a job. His past reputation followed him, and Shanghai no longer welcomed him. Eventually, he had no choice but to return to his hometown. Today, he reportedly works as a regular employee at a small company, barely making ends meet. More tragically, because of the scandal, the name “Xiang Haiqing” has become synonymous with the term “ungrateful wolf.”
In later interviews, Sun Li admitted she was so angry she couldn’t sleep for three days. But in the end, she realized: “Helping others must be done wisely.” Today, she only donates through formal foundations, never through private transfers.
A final reflection
Sometimes, those who only know how to receive may not deserve our sympathy. Only those who understand the value of gratitude are genuinely worthy of others’ kindness. As the saying goes: “Helping others is an act of grace, not an obligation.” To be helped is a blessing — but one must carry a heart of gratitude, and never take goodwill for granted.
Translated by Katy Liu and edited by Amanda
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